Important Disclaimer: I do not endorse (or recommend) Komunitas Salihara’s Stanislavski class, please read my post here: https://miadjojowasito.com/2016/11/14/important-disclaimer-maria-djojowasito-does-not-endorse-the-stanislavski-class-at-komunitas-salihara/

I do not want my name associated with this community in any capacity and wish to distance myself from Komunitas Salihara and the Stanislavski class. This is not an acting class, this was run like a pay-to-play programme misleadingly marketed as a ‘class’, which was run in a disability-unfriendly environment that is not safe for women:

 

Sexual harassment at Komunitas Salihara (2016)
Sexual harassment at Komunitas Salihara (2016)

 

 

Shakespeare (Fandex Family Field Guides)Shakespeare by Thomas J. Craughwell
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Much fun. And helpful (has film/television versions to watch as reference). Systematic too (the index, divided by plays/sonnets and background info, is good for making mind maps in your mind). And also you can fan yourself with Willy’s face, which is always cool. Page 96: “Exit, pursued by a bear.”

View all my reviews


Looky! My new rehearsals/acting class uniform! I decided to treat myself to some nice ballet-theme outfits because some people in my #Stanislavski class think I don't deserve to play King Lear's Cordelia because I'm "not a dancer" and treat me like a Wallis Simpson and make me feel unwelcome in class. Despite the fact that I worked hard for that role, researched, practiced, and I did end up making choreography for the scenes I'm in. These should help me feel comfortable and feel more entitled to be in class—because the fact of the matter is, I have every right to be there (although I don't necessarily feel like I belong, and I don't want to 'belong' among a flock of meanies anyway). I like to think of this as long-term therapy without the shrinks… The capuchon is too warm for practice, though (maybe if I practiced in northern Europe—it's like my cinema/theatre uniform which is a @SnoopyGrams capuchon). I got at a specialty store that I discovered at the 1st Indonesian Ballet Gala (last year). Besides, my old rehearsal/class clothes were getting worn… I own two pairs of Mycroft tights (royal purple and dark grey—I bought them downstairs for the acting workshop in November 2014) and four cotton shirts (magenta, banana yellow, neon-ish lime, and white/neon yellow horizontal stripes). Then I have three pairs of Aladdin/Jasmine trousers (light turquoise, lavender, dark brown). I used to wear them for rehearsals in 2015. I recently bought four kaos engkoh-engkoh in bulk (one is literally the flimsy white my late grampa used to wear on the porch—which he also always wears with shorts and leather sandals when he visits in my dreams to give me snacks, and I also have them in: army green, teal, and a cornflower/cerulean hybrid). Then I got these tights in (mint, light yellow, tosca blue, and Fanta pink). So many pwetty colours! Hm. Speaking of Mycroft tights, my parents want me to use the hamster wheel—but it's not beautiful/graceful like #ballet so I refuse to get on it! Mother is having a lot of fun making fun of me when I screw up moves and derives way too much pleasure in smugly showing me the correct way to do the basics. LOL. 🐰🎀☕️ #MiaTheBallerinaREBORN #Day21

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Aku emang nggak pernah boleh salah dikit di kelas ini…

  1. Kerja keras aja yang biasanya akan bikin rata-rata sutradara senang/lega dijadiin personlity flaw atau personal fault (pokoknya good job aku dipelintir sedemikian rupa sehingga bisa dijadiin sesuatu yang buruk).
  2. Selalu dituduh “taking things personally” padahal kenyataannya yang ngomong begitu sendirinya kalo mengenai persoalan substantif yang seharusnya bisa ditangani secara obyektif selalu dijadikan alasan untuk ngomong “kamu, sih, begini-begitu” (dijadiin sesuatu yang personal) padahal bisa aja fokus ke persoalan dan bukan person-nya. Misalnya: Aku bilang, “aduh, tangan gue memar di dua spot hari ini…” (Harusnya kalo yang diajak ngomong rada cerdas dikit gitu, bahasan bisa menjadi mengenai teknik jatuh di panggung yang puitik tapi aman, tapi berhubung orangnya hateful malah ngomel kayak aku yang banyak alesan/manja biar bisa sok kejam kayak Stanley Kubrick/Hitchcock, kali, maksudnya).
  3. Atau lebih parahnya, kadang mereka malah jadi gas-lighting aku (bilangnya itu cuma perasaan aku, padahal bukti konkretnya ada).
  4. Kesalahan aku selalu dicari-cari dan kalo kebetulan salah kayak langsung: Berasa dapet angin to berate me… Jangankan emang legitimately salah, nggak salah aja dibikin-bikin kesalahan yang enggak-enggak. Suka ngada-ngada… Beberapa murid sini emang ‘auranya’ udah kayak polantas korup yang ngelihat mangsa melakukan pelanggaran (baik pelanggaran riil maupun fiktif/imajiner). Dan marahnya maksimal—pake lebay dan seringkali nggak proporsional. What is wrong with you people? Extract butt plug, insert chill pill. Sheesh.
  5. Kerjaannya ngetawain/menghina akting aktor Indonesia, tapi giliran aku (yang emang niat dan punya credit filem/teater, walaupun cuma tiga biji dan filemnya filem pendek) masuk untuk meningkatkan kemampuan malah nggak dikasih kesempatan berkembang (mungkin maksudnya biar aktor Indonesia tetep jelek dan mereka bisa terus ngomel soal akting aktor Indonesia yang kelewat lebay, so they can feel better about themselvesit’s sick and twisted).
  6. Nggak ada yang berantem aja diadu domba via WhatsApp japri supaya berantem, kayak on-stage drama nggak cukup buatnya. Padahal kalau aku di kelas ini bersikap keras/hostile, itu pasti karena ada yang mulai duluan (ada yang provokasi/melewati boundaries—segala belligerence aku nggak pernah ada yang gratuitous, pasti aku lakukan untuk self-defence).
  7. Ada yang sosiopat/psikopat (betulan nggak punya empati) juga, kayaknya… (Yang ini udah lihat aku pernah bahas ED-NOS malah makin menjadi dijadiin bahan sindiran, bawa-bawa fisik melulu kayak dia udah paling gede-dan-oke sendiri di kelas kayak di Studio Tari nggak ada kaca aja, kerjaannya mimik gerakan aku untuk ngenyek, malahan dulu suka pegang-pegang tanpa boundary pulak sebelum aku ancam via WhatsApp!)
  8. I just witnessed my work (ideas, acting interpretations, choreography) being given to another actress without credit (padahal aku kan bukan sutradara/penulis, dan karya aku harusnya tetap bagian performance aku—berarti kalau aku tadinya nggak pernah memberanikan diri minta, ide aku mau diembat tapi aku nggak boleh pakai hasil pemikiran/interpretasi aku sendiri karena cuma Salieri yang boleh penting) tapi masih bisa-bisanya nyindir aku yang “nggak punya malu”, bisa-bisanya ngomongin soal ‘hak’ (gimana wajah aku nggak mengeras menahan marah? Lalu fisik aku diejek karenanya pula). Seniman kok nggak punya rasa hormat terhadap effort dalam proses membuat seni. Sebenarnya yang “nggak punya malu” di sini siapa, sih?

Standar ganda yang munafik. What is it with you people? (And that isn’t even half of the mean things they’ve done to me in this class, ini belum termasuk topik-topik yang tabu untuk dibahas—things that are crass to discuss, uncomfortable topics, belum lagi pemikiran aku mengenai mereka yang terlampau kejam untuk dilisankan apalagi dituliskan.) Aktor kok nggak kayak manusia…

Aku aja yang hobinya mainin bola, kursi, dan bercita-cita pengen jadi batu aja masih lebih manusia daripada yang katanya “manusia”.


Hidup memang lebih indah kalau melihat segala sesuatu dari segi positif (dan malahan jadi kelihatan, kan, siapa yang suka mengecilkan peran kecil? Yang jelas bukan aku). Akhirnya aku diam daripada capek debat kusir, mendingan baca buku... Kalau aku menganggapnya sebagai hal yang hina dan buruk, buat apa aku rela meminta peran Puteri Bungsu sampai dimusuhi orang sekelas?!
Hidup memang lebih indah kalau melihat segala sesuatu dari segi positif (dan malahan jadi kelihatan, kan, siapa yang suka mengecilkan peran kecil? Yang jelas bukan aku). Akhirnya aku diam daripada capek debat kusir, mendingan baca buku… Kalau aku menganggapnya sebagai hal yang hina dan buruk, buat apa aku rela meminta peran Puteri Bungsu sampai dimusuhi orang sekelas?!

See? This is why I stopped (or at least tried to reduce) speaking in class. Every single thing I say (even reassurance that my absence won’t cost the class rehearsal any trouble) is turned into a mistake… Apa-apa salah! The nitpicking is way OTT.

(OMG BIGGEST DEAL EVER WHEN I WIN AN OSCAR FOR SUPPORTING ACTRESS IM GOING TO DEMAND THE ACADEMY GIVE ME A LEAD ACTRESS AWARD INSTEAD BECAUSE MY STANISLAVSKI CLASS TAUGHT ME THERE ARE NO “SMALL ROLES” OMG OMG.)

"Rileks..."
“Rileks…”

Because you don’t need to be skillful or talented to have money… This is going to break Mother’s heart (walaupun secara umum nggak restu, tapi Nyokap selalu wanti-wanti dan checking in on me bahwa aku nggak akanbeli perandan memang berdasarkan kerja keras—she’s fine with me acting for unpaid gigs as long as I’m not the one doing the paying because she thinks that kind of thing is disgraceful).

Kalian telah menghiburku...
Kalian telah menghiburku…

http://sherry-holmes.tumblr.com/post/137744140723/sherlock-daddy-sherlock-daaaddyyy

Watching a wayang call his father “Daddy” and speaking French was hella amusing. LMAO!


Buseeet, buset...
Buseeet, buset…
Me at 15:07 (I came late on purpose today because I've been on-time arriving at 13:30–14:15 between Weeks 2–8 and they'd start at 16:00+ and so I said fuck it, I'm coming late and I walked in class like a 'star' and took my time). And finally now, next week the classes will start at 15:00, so I won't be coming on-time for nothing...
Me at 15:07 (I came late on purpose today because I’ve been on-time arriving at 13:30–14:15 between Weeks 2–8 and they’d start at 16:00+ and so I said fuck it, I’m coming late and I walked in class like a ‘star’ and took my time). And finally now, next week the classes will start at 15:00, so I won’t be coming on-time for nothing…
Page One
Page One
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Page Two

I love you’ll apologise for not giving a ‘dancer’ choreography but you feel no remorse for giving choreography I created (and interpreted as an actress) to someone else… I love the artists’ spirit in this so-called “art community”, because I’m the one who’s shameless. Cuma aku yang bisa diperlakukan semena-mena kayak begitu dan masih disindir “nggak tahu malu” mere seconds after watching my ideas given to someone else. Don’t you dare pull a Salieri on me.

Finally, the telly and sound system will be back in the study soon and I'll be able to practice non-stop butoh whilst watching hour-long DVDs! No mirrors, but this practice will be about endurance (not form) and so it'll be fine to not look in the mirror.
Finally, the telly and sound system will be back in the study soon and I’ll be able to practice non-stop butoh whilst watching hour-long DVDs! No mirrors, but this practice will be about endurance (not form) and so it’ll be fine to not look in the mirror.
I think for the forest scene, II'll wear the leather ballet slippers (because they're the only ones I can wear without tights/socks—and closest to my skin colour) as they're snug and so nicely-fitted, it's almost like they're integrated onto your feet and you sort of feel barefoot in a way. I want the character to look barefoot like everyone else without hurting myself.
I think for the forest scene, II’ll wear the leather ballet slippers (because they’re the only ones I can wear without tights/socks—and closest to my skin colour) as they’re snug and so nicely-fitted, it’s almost like they’re integrated onto your feet and you sort of feel barefoot in a way. I want the character to look barefoot like everyone else without hurting myself.

Yay! I’m going to be playing dress-up for a friends’ wedding tomorrow! It’ll be a Padangnese wedding… Hm.

Last updated: March 5, 2016 @ 21:15
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